People will never cease to surprise me I guess. People make assumptions and they are often determined partially by experience with others. I am guilty of this as well (judging) if I am going to be honest.
Let me start by explaining who I am for those people who want to judge me.
First, I am a follower of Christ. I have never, nor will I ever claim to be perfect. I strive to follow Him and I fail, but try harder. It is not some endless hamster wheel, it is more like a path with many distractions. I learn to keep my focus better on the path and where it is taking me. I know where the final destination is and I have my ticket already. I am not worried about not arriving, I am concerned with what I do while on the path though. Hope that makes sense.
Second, I have many rules with my kids. My rules are not the same as anyone else's, nor are they the same as the ones I grew up with. My rules are based upon many things, common sense, prayer, the Bible, other things I have read, people I have met, older couples I have spent time with (good or bad), experiences I have had, and many other things. Go to Walmart, find a woman screaming at her kids, and I bet you will make a small choice as to some rules as well.
My rules are not because I want to control everything my children are doing. I want to raise my children to love God, to serve Him and others. I want my kids to want this for themselves. Shoving anything down their throats is a stupid waste of time that won't work anyways. My children see me struggle and fail, and pray for more strength. They have seen the hand of God in our lives and they know God loves them. They see it modeled for them, and would certainly be able to see through things that are fake. I have seen children raised by what appeared to be a Christian household bolt at the first chance they get because they were suffocating with too many rules. I strive NOT to make that mistake with mine.
Third, I believe strange people will go to the extreme in whatever philosophy they hold on to. For example, those who read a book like Raising Kids God's Way or to Train Up a Child and take those things to the extreme like beating a child to death are wackos. They are going to be wackos no matter what book they read, look at Charles Manson or Hitler or any other wacko that lived before those books were published.
Likewise, those who read a book from Dr Sears and never ever punish a child are on the opposite side of the spectrum. I've seen them - those who never want their kids to hear the word "no." I know one local lady who has never let her 5 year old hear the word, never said it to him and won't leave him with anyone because she doesn't want them to use it around him. That is not real life either. The world will tell you "no" - you cannot speed or spend more than you make before it catches up with you.
The authors have not made either person the way they are, while they might have encouraged certain behaviour from the person, they have not put anything there the person wasn't already capable of to begin with. I am a peaceful person, so I cringe at things others don't bat a lash at, while others probably wish I was harder on my kids. Once a lady in the grocery actually told me my kids and my calm voice were driving her crazy, she was hoping I would yell at them. I am sure there have been others on shopping trips who wished I didn't yell so much.
I really do think we should examine Jesus and try to live as He did with regard to how he treated people while He walked the earth.
I think we are all different, and God created us to be that way. My magazine subscription would probably surprise you. I get:
Above Rubies
Vegetarian Times
The Old Schoolhouse
Mothering
Horse & Rider
Highlights
In Style
Vision Forum
Creation
Real Simple
Answers in Genesis
Clean Eating
All You
I:
co-sleep,
breastfeed, on demand,
homeschool,
wear my babies in a sling or carrier,
vaccinate,
watch movies,
wear pants and make-up most days,
have been known to say bad words,
trust that the instincts God gave me are correct,
love my kids,
love my husband,
see a chiropractor,
use a pediatrician,
make money outside my home,
think Tim Tebow & Andrew Pujols are great sport figures,
dress modestly, yet modernly - and so do my kids,
eat healthy most of the time,
lose my temper,
explain my reasons for things to my kids,
told my neighbor off once,
let my kids play team sports,
think kids need lots of outside play time for exercise and general well-being,
am pro-life,
think my kids are beautiful individuals, all different in their own way,
pray for my neighbors often,
apologize when I yell at my kids,
try to treat others as I want to be treated,
think children are going to change the world one day,
love big families and
most importantly LOVE GOD.
I DON'T:
pretend to be perfect,
let my kids date,
beat my kids,
think that people who use birth control are going to hell,
believe in evolution,
like people who are fake,
send my kids to nursery at church,
make fun of others for what they believe,
like people who are horrible parents (although I do pray for them),
think that you should follow any one person's view on raising kids,
like rigid schedules and have never followed one,
pretend to have all the answers,
think mothers should listen to strange men on how to nurse their babies,
scream at people on street corners to change their ways,
think my kids are little clones of me,
like public school for a number of reasons,
think it is appropriate to comment on people's family size,
like selfish people,
have a perfect house,
think my kids are perfect,
think anybody is beyond God's redeeming grace.
